The meals stop at week three and the phone stops at week six. A man who spent forty years being useful now sits in a house where nothing needs doing.
Give him something to carry. Do it every week until he starts showing up on his own.
Pull the Widower In
Men disappear after a funeral. Give him a seat in the men's study and an actual job on the truck team. He needs a role, not another casserole.
What you'll need
- A standing invitation with a time and an address, repeated
- A job with his name on it — driving, grilling, hauling, setup
- One other guy who'll ride with him so he's not walking in alone
What to say
We're loading the truck at 8 on Saturday and I need a second driver. You in? I'll pick you up.
Pitfalls
- Don't ask how he's doing every time. Ask him to hand you the drill.
- Text the day before, every time, for about a year. He will not initiate.
- Feed him, but not with a drop-off. Take him to breakfast where he has to talk to a waitress.
Two are better than one — for if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls. — Ecclesiastes 4:9–10