Strengthen Your Marriage — Intimacy Guide

Question 1 — Who's filling this out?

I'm the wife I'm the husband

Question 2 — How often are you and your spouse being intimate right now?

Question 3 — How do you feel about that frequency?

Happy — it feels about right Neutral — could go either way I want more than we're having I want less than we're having I think we both want more but it isn't happening

Question 4 — Who tends to initiate?

Almost always me Almost always my spouse It's roughly mutual Honestly, neither of us much

Question 5 — Which best describes how you experience desire most of the time?

It just shows up — I feel it before anything starts I rarely feel it upfront, but I'm open and get into it once things start I usually engage out of love or care more than feeling desire I find myself avoiding or feeling closed off to sex Honestly, I'm not sure

Question 6 — How easy is it to actually talk to your spouse about sex?

Easy — we talk about it openly Mostly okay but it gets awkward fast We rarely talk about it When we try, it usually turns into a fight We basically never talk about it

Question 7 — What story do you find yourself telling about why things are the way they are?

Pick the one closest to what runs through your head, even if it's uncomfortable. None of these are right or wrong — they just point at what's underneath.

My spouse isn't attracted to me anymore My spouse only wants my body, not me I'm broken — my drive is wrong My spouse is being selfish about this We're just in a hard season (kids, work, health) We're fundamentally incompatible here It's no one's fault — we've just drifted Something else (tell me in question 8)

Question 8 — Anything else that would help this land?

Optional, but the more you give it, the more specific the read. Your season of life, what you've already tried, anything you don't want this to assume, a medical or mental-health factor that's in play, or what story you'd write yourself if the options above didn't fit.

Free, private, nothing is saved. Usually back in 20–40 seconds.

Your read

Read it once with curiosity, not as a verdict. If something here doesn't fit your story — step around it. Pick one curiosity script or one experiment and try just that this week. The point isn't to fix everything at once.